“ Never give a human the job of making you happy. Some days, they might call in sick.
Other days, they might quit.” ~ Vessel
Are you a fan of thought-provoking quotes? Does the one above resonate with you as much as it does with me?
The very first time I read this quote, I immediately thought, what a clever way to highlight the importance of “self-love”. After all, can we truly be happy, if we are relying on another person to provide that happiness? From my perspective, the answer is no. How then do we find happiness? Simple...self-love. In other words, to “have love and happiness” in our lives, we must first “radiate love and happiness from within”. Sounds easy, right? In reality, it’s a much harder concept to grasp than most realize.
Many of us have unknowingly spent the greater part of our lives giving and receiving “contingent” love. Meaning, I’ll love you, if you love me in return; or, I’ll appreciate and show “love” for your efforts, as long as they bring benefit to me. This form of “contingent” love is born out of an attachment to the outcome, and that need is often the result of an existing sense of lack. All too often we give this version of “contingent” love to fill a void in our lives. Think barter system, only you’re bartering for your own happiness. What happens then when the contingency fails or the person you’re bartering with reneges on the deal?
This is about the moment in contemplating this quote, where I (and possibly you) look back on past relationships, business partnerships and even friendships, wondering how often the love was “contingent”, but I digress.
Now alternatively, consider if you were first to honor, respect and love yourself.
By having the ability to love yourself regardless of whether a situation ends well or not, you are essentially removing the need (or attachment) to the outcome. As a result, any love you give is purely a gift to the other person, and any love you receive in return? Well that becomes a delicious dessert, on top of the already beautiful main course you’ve provided yourself. Sounds like a meal worth investing in!
So how can self love benefit you in business relationships?
The question should really be, how can it not?!
From the time you are young and green in the field, to the time you’re well established and move with ease, “honoring yourself” can be the stepping stone to a fulfilling and rewarding career. To truly honor yourself, means to have a healthy understanding of where you bring value to the table, while simultaneously acknowledging your inner moral compass. To properly navigate the business world, it’s important when entering new partnerships or situations, that you already know where you stand. If you don’t have a developed sense of self, you are more easily manipulated or swayed from your original purpose.
Whether you start today, or you’ve done-so for many years, truly loving and appreciating yourself is a key building block for moving through life, love and business from a place of stability, versus a place of lack. And that is cause to celebrate. Cheers!
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